April 2012
448 posts
I wonder what will happen in a year and a half. Will you still be up there? Will I be here? Will we still love each other? Wait. You don’t love me. Nevermind. Oh look. There are no more crackers. WHHHYYYYY. Why no crackers? Why not weed? Why not there? Why did I leave?! Why!? Wht?! Oh, the pain will haunt me forever, Is it worth it to go on?
I would quite like a poptart
And I don’t even like poptarts.
The filling is too sweet.
Like fig newtons or those granola bars with the fruit in the middle.
What's the point of Life?
No one has been able to answer this for me.
Peanut Butter and Orange Juice
Are not good together.
And rum. Why is it not as tasty as the coconut rum and orange juice my sister gave me last night? Why?
Also, the dash is dead. Very dead. Everyone is out and about. And I sit here… I could be sitting at my sister’s holding a baby but I decided to come back to school a day early. Everything is boring. I miss having people around.
Anyone out there want to chat?...
March 2012
309 posts
Internships
Guessing by the fact I have not received an acceptance letter for the Chinese Summer Camp internship, I’m supposing that I did not get it. Which is very sad. Now trying to apply to another one on campus, non-paying, but oh well. It deals with marketing, which works. Can’t seem to find the right words though for the cover letter. Might go walk Connor when he wakes up and think about it.
We were married in my dream but I had lost my ring. And you.
I Just had a dream where I sang a song about new London at christmas time. And Ron Weasley called me to tell me that st. Nicolas would appreciate gift donations.
Why did she tell me that I chose this place?
Because I did.
But I still feel stuck.
I had to chose it.
But I didn’t. I could have stayed an extra semester.
Why didn’t I go?
Now I’m here.
And I’m not sure why.
I don’t feel stuck here—
I feel stuck in life.
And only one thing keeps popping into my mind,
but I have to push it away.
It wouldn’t be...
Why does talking to a therapist make me feel worse?
back
to
the
beginning.
A list of Me.
I like cats.
And peanut butter.
And tacos.
And sushi. But only certain types of sushi.
And pandas.
And peonies.
And tulips.
And pink.
And green.
And lizards.
But not the ones that attacked me in my dream.
Or godzilla.
I like Wallace Stevens.
And Blue October.
I like birds.
And ladybugs.
I like rocks.
I like grass.
But not ants.
I like to sleep.
Just to stop thinking.
I like...
I think I’m sobering up.
But I don’t know where I put my pants.
…. <.<
“Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to...”
– C.S. Lewis (via onlinecounsellingcollege)
No more banana and peanut butter.
I is sad.
Coke is almost gone. Ah so sad. Chinese is never gone. neeevvvveeeerrrr gone. I will go there. And be wonderful. Just kidding. I will go to Croatia and teach English there. And all will be well. And I’ll meet a hot Croatian guy who likes to talk about writing and philosophy and fun things. Like whether or not it’s okay to eat ice cream in winter. Because it is. Especially...
baaaannnnnaaaaannnnnnaaaaaa
and peanut butter.
tasty, mashty.
Is it worth it to be in Love?
Heartbreaks
Heartbreaks are so funny. Not funny in the haha type, but funny in that there’s almost nothing you can do to fix them.They’re not like scraps or cuts or venous malformations where you can put a band-aid on them/inject them with stuff and they go away. No, they stay there for a long time. There’s nothing to fix them but time, if time will even fix them. And they hurt too. They...
“I was not wounded in any part of my body, but I had never experienced such...”
– Piscine Molitor Patel, Life of Pi, Yann Martel (via nubivagantmusings)
haha
No need for studying!
well…maybe. Maybe Not. Oh… lalala… I need to do that assignment. I’m going to fail again. yay. yayayaya. I’m such a terrible person. No, no, I’m terrible to myself. Oh well.
I should really be studying Chinese. I have to take a quiz tomorrow. But instead, apparently I’m going to be tipsy. That was a tiny bit of rum. Why is it affecting me so much? Odd. very odd.
“Set your life on fire.
Seek those who
fan your flames.”
– Rumi (via konagrown)
Tests and People
What a waste of time that networking thing was. They stuffed us into a tiny room and everyone was so crowded that no one could tell who the employers were! The only way to tell was that their name tag had red on it. Most everyone was standing around. I managed to talk to four people, but still. Such a waste.
To think I even waved/curled my hair for it.
On the bright side the test was insanely...
Pretty sure I’m going to throw up… Why must I have a test right after this? I
Test
I’ve just now looked at my test review sheet for my class at six… I don’t know half the stuff on it. oops. and I also have yet to prepare for the fancy networking meeting at 5:30. huh. Yet I’m still watching House.
Lunch
My god, listening to science professors complain about adjuncts and research and overtime is Facinating.
Apparently I'm normal
I’ve been noticing a lot of people talking to themselves today. Either everyone’s crazy or I’ve started a trend. Yay loneliness!
To go to Class or Not to go to Class…
That is the question.
Funny enough, It’s a Shakespeare class! I haven’t missed any off them and I frankly have to study for my test tonight. Meh. I’ll probably just go. I can study in the class. There isn’t a whole lot to Macbeth that I didn’t go over in High School. Stupid College. Why am I paying for this crap? My AP...
When sadness was the sea, you were the one that...
apocalypsepoet:
You were
A sonata in moonlight,
The flowing
Eloquent night melody
To my pale
Stolen illumination.
You were the
Sweet justification
To my bitterly ironic
Existence.
What happened march 3rd? Why did you send me an air horn in my dream? What does it mean?
Classes
Sigh. At least I can sign up for them. Now just everyone and their brother is.